Tag Archives: spirituality

A Poem Called “From Death to Life”

From Death to Life,

by theamazinJ

I died.
I live.
I went to heaven.
I went home.
I came back.
I went home.
I left the hill.
I walked the plank.
I swam in the ocean.
I climbed the highest cliff.
I walked across on the bridge to the next cliff.
I flew with my wings.
I flew to the ground.
I dropped my wings.
I started walking.
I walked over the bounty.
I crawled onto the ground.
I sprawled my body spreading myself on the grass.
I sent over my gold.
I received my award.
I journeyed through the heavens.
I spent my ferocious volume expending my knowledge.
I guru’d my life.
I leapt through thou.
Thou created me.
I created thou.
I am Thou.
I am heaven.
I am hell.
I am darkness.
I am light.
I am.
Up, down, up, down.
Lifting me.
You lift yourself.
I am lift me.
I expend the journey of death
to live life into my head,
into my brain, into my mind,
into my heart bleeding before you.
I spill myself to you.
My richness into the light,
my goals of the spot.
My spot going good,
depleting the bad.
Spilling my guts.
OMG OMG OMG,
I am dead, no, I AM ALIVE.
My liveliness is a journey.
the pill is pain,
the passing to be something different is hard.
the passing to be me is easy.
the passing to be disabled,
the passing to be non-disabled,
the passing to be neurotypical,
the passing to be the original neurodivergent self I am,
passing into the slides of pane healing the pain.
Life constitutes life.
Death hardens death.
Death is a social construction.
Life is continuous.
Continuous life while crossing the curtain,
while crossing over to the other side.
The other side that is unknown,
that is scary, and that is life.
Life is scary, but we need to jump at it.
Life is scary, but we need to focus on what we want,
not what others want, but really what we want individually.
The tyrant or the martyr or just the person that we are.
I love you. I love you so much. I love you with all my might.
My mighty love is great, it is extensive.
extensive to be smart, to show our intelligence, to brighten up with our creative nature.
Making artistic expression, making creative continuity, filming our life’s journey
into the separate waves of the world.
I love you, can you love the world you’re in?
I love you, can you turn your hate into love?
I love you, can you turn your naive, ignorant, and lies into truth?
I Love YOU, so I want to see you in my heart, in my dreams, and in my reality,
because, I love you, I love all of you, and I love every piece of everyone.
Spend time in your heart to love
when life can go from low to high in a blink of an eye,
essentially cause of how much you show love
and how much you gain from love.
Spread love to spread life until we cross over into the depths of more life.

A Poem Called “Society Meets the Activist”

Society Meets the Activist,

by theamazinJ

One day,
a long time ago,
in a far off place,
society met an Activist,
the first of their kind.
The Activist spoke out against everything society stood for,
I mean, everything, literally everything,
Talking about society’s social construction,
talking about society’s discrimination,
even talking about society’s lack of accommodation,
and when the shit hit the fan even more,
society’s idea of passing rather than being true to ourselves.
The Activist turns 20, then 30, then 40 and so on,
and every time the Activist says something,
they are bullied into silence,
they are told they are fake,
they are told to be quiet and let society just be,
they are told to not be loud and proud,
they are told to take a vacation or just leave society for good,
everywhere the Activist goes,
he wants to make a difference,
to show the society what Human dignity means,
what Human respect means,
and the ways everyone needs accommodating,
the way society can be accessible if they even try,
A long time ago before the first of the month,
society jumped in to vote for a sloth,
a man who would fight Activists,
a man who would say the work Activists have done was fake,
a man who created the term Fake News,
a man who marked war against the world,
a man who created fights between himself and every minority group
including the disability minority group,
especially those people who think and play and move and live differently than him,
a man who is a supremacist,
a man who hates Activists, but then calls himself an Activist for doing what he does,
Activists have gotten criticism for the work they do
and even from the very first Activist a long time ago
in a galaxy far far away,
because being an Activist is tough,
being an Activist is one of the hardest things anyone can do,
Activists make societies uncomfortable,
Activists make the leader of any society go crazy,
Activists speak out and then get hashed by society,
Activists ignore society’s words,
until the Activist actually passes on,
then everyone praises the Activist who spoke out,
and a day or memorial becomes real for the Activist who passed on
to one day everyone quoting them
even when everyone fought against the Activist while alive,
even when everyone took a stand that they would never do it,
however, the Activist took a stand, and now everyone listens,
and now, everyone sees what they said,
finally in the end,
The Activist looks down upon the society from the heavens above,
noticing this change, noticing this new embodiment,
and says to oneself with all smiles and chuckling:
“Now, they listen, really, now they really are listening
really, I am astonished, I am a star up here in the heavens,
shining down on them at night, and
when I could speak, no one wanted to listen to me,
thanks a lot to all thou, thanks to all thou”
As society takes on more and more giving and less trash talk
for what the Activist said, for every action the Activist conveyed,
and for every time the Activist fought them to be heard
exactly how they Activist wanted to heard,
So, continue what you are doing,
if you believe it,
someday it will happen.
Someday they will all listen,
even if it takes a lifetime.
Believe.
And Move forward.

A Poem Called “Mourning”

(Trigger Warning: the painful moments may trigger some.)

Mourning,

by theamazinJ

Violence,
hurt,
physical pain,
emotional pain,
murderous draining of blood,
seeping from our veins abstractly,
the pain persists with everyone,
it persists in the community,
it persists in segregated settings,
it persists with disabled people,
it persists with black people,
it persists with jewish people,
it persists with muslims,
it persists with women,
it persists with differences in gender and (a)sexuality,
it persists because of eugenics,
it persists cause of American society today
especially with Donald Trump,
especially with the dark past history of America,
especially with this construction from Francis Galton,
the pain hurts even deeper and darker than that,
from the deepest roots of human history,
many people are in pain,
many people are in mourning
the lack of empathy from the current social construction
of how many individuals in mainstream society don’t understand,
of how many don’t want to understand,
and how we cannot get it right,
we cannot listen to each other,
of how no one has true understanding
unless the person has experienced
or flipped to that side of the coin,
and that only happens when we allow ourselves to experience,
when we just experience it,
and we begin to heal,
heal through humor,
heal through communicating,
heal through love,
heal through laughing amongst each other,
in the community and not in congregate settings separated from the community,
because it’s all about us,
it is all about life,
it’s not about mourning,
it’s not supposed to be a dark life,
it’s supposed to be about seeing the light,
seeing the positive sides of life,
experiencing and loving who we are
so we can experience and love everyone around us,
without causing pain to us or anyone else
regardless of how much pain we already have,
it’s about letting go and moving forward,
It’s Nothing about us, without us,
it’s just about love,
can you go back in time,
to a place in your mind,
to the one you knew you that you just couldn’t find,
when it’s said and done it’s not about losing love,
it’s not about the pain,
it’s about gaining love from everyone we meet,
taking in everything, but not taking too much pain,
the mourning of this day,
heals us when we can laugh instead of cry,
when we can let go and celebrate lives lost,
when we can let go and celebrate our own life,
and when we can just let go and move forward,
Mourning is more about how we laugh until we had to cry
and say to each other,
I love you no matter what,
I love you for who you are or who you were,
people touch, and it lives in our lives forever,
so, let’s move forward
and let’s meet halfway,
made of memories,
believing in destiny,
every moment is about getting living every moment
in the way we stick to each other in the community
regardless of impairments, regardless of what labels society gives us,
and we are stronger when we have given up,
given up on our egos,
given up on our arrogance,
and lived for the humility of humanity,
remembering and always never forgetting,
disability is a major part of human life,
so don’t neglect yourself, don’t neglect others,
and begin to accept the diversity in everything,
the diversity of life, between where we are
where we identify, claiming neurodivergent and claiming disability and even claiming neurotypicality,
finally,
it does not matter what people claim,
it just matters to be happy,
and live knowing
normality is real, but normality is accepting life the way it is,
in the living years
say it loud, say it clear,
so don’t blame the ones before, presently, or after,
just laugh with perfect humor among each other,
no matter what, no matter who,
when nothing about us, without us
really does matter.

A Poem Called “History”

History,

by theamazinj

Story,
feelings,
hurt,
healing,
history.
History says,
stop and think,
history says,
go ahead and review,
history says,
forget and forgive,
history says,
neurodiversity,
history says,
we are neurodivergent
unless we claim to be neurotypical
from the social construction.
Whether Neurotypical or claiming Neurodivergence,
we are here or we are there,
we are sad or we are happy,
we are gone or we are forgotten,
we are staying or we are leaving.
Every day is history,
every year is history
every day we remember not repeat history,
from pre-history days to historical views,
from the day we end it to the day we begin,
from what we hate to what we love,
every day is a good day of extenuating circumstances,
love or be loved, hate or be hated,
everyone loves yet everyone hates at the same time.
Do we go?
Do we let loose?
do we win? or, do we lose?
do we just let go?
Communicate to let go,
leave to let go,
stay to let go,
drive to let go,
roll to let go,
spin in circles to release everything,
release the tension,
release the bitterness,
release the anger,
release the love deep in your heart.
Everywhere we go,
everywhere we attend,
wherever we enter,
whatever we exit,
go and be seen,
include yourself in what you want,
exclude what you do not like,
saying it will be heard later,
without feeling guilty for doing that.
Sometimes we are hurt,
sometimes we feel situated in our brain with ease,
building our mind with knowledge,
creatively discovering who and what we are,
inventing and reinventing until we become the person we are meant to be,
sometimes gone,
sometimes hurt,
sometimes we are longing for lust,
while longing for our hearts to be satisfied.
Feeling nature, experiencing everything around us,
and building who we are with
who we are with self-determination.
Sometimes it takes growth,
sometimes it takes seclusion,
sometimes it takes isolation,
while sometimes we need to live in solitude.
Some may say its loneliness,
when it really just is self-care, self-love, and self-worth.
Giving our identity to the world can be overwhelming,
giving every word every sentence and every picture,
exposes everything and pushes us to detach from the community.
We have our faith, we have our lion, we have our gopher, and once again,
we have our spirit in the winds,
no matter what we do,
it’s on us,
because it’s history,
it’s in our genes,
it’s in how we express those genes,
and it’s how we see the world through the social model,
through the way disability is a part of us all,
finally being the imperfect of who we are.
History: The story of our lives.
disabled or non-disabled,
accepting or just being in pain,
it’s time for the future,
for the future of history.

A Poem Called “Disease”

Disease,

by theamazinJ

Pushing,
pulling,
feuding,
crying for help,
hurting from the pain
from everyone around
who don’t appreciate,
from everyone who
don’t understand life.
Arguing with each other,
swinging the bodies in disgust,
feeling out of control,
the starchness of who we are,
as disabled people,
as we are neurodivergent,
as we are told to pass,
as we can’t be who we are,
as everyone becomes robots,
as everyone’s movements become fixed,
and the way we communicate become stuck,
without flapping,
without spinning,
without moving in the way that we are free,
without speaking with our true voice,
and speaking, moving, and guarding ourselves
in a way society wants.
It saddens me society doesn’t understand,
it hurts me society won’t give respect
unless these things are done,
and everyone does what is necessary
to be considered intelligent,
unless everyone speaks, moves, and intellectualizes in a way
society wants it
to gain the respect we should have had all along.
Society can be funny.
the physiology can be different than the way society actually is,
the way our brains work,
the way our bodies move,
and the way our spirit is to make a difference,
everyone is here for a purpose,
everyone intellectualizes differently,
everyone has different thoughts,
everyone is here to get their voices out there,
to debate, to argue their points, and to listen
however we all listen,
we are not here to be robots,
we are not here to be clones,
and certainly we are not here to be different than who we are.
Everywhere we go, everywhere we burst into a room,
every time we open a door,
we open the door to another opening
to another meeting,
to meeting more people,
to seeing what we can see,
to hearing new things
and to meet with new partners,
eventually committing to a partner if we choose.
Sometimes we have positive thoughts,
sometimes we have negative thoughts,
and many times the positive and the negative fight together in our heads,
creating anxiety and not knowing what to do.
The power of thought helps us know
what we want to think,
whether it is positive or negative,
or just a debate in our head,
or just a voice we are struggling to hear from another person.
Sometimes we would do anything for love,
even run from hell and back,
and sometimes we actually meet people for a reason to help us at the time
who only help us grow to meet the people who stick with us for life,
while meeting people every day of our life,
speaking the moment of truth,
finding the love we need to live,
while engaging with violent outbursts in our heads
between negative and positive thoughts,
and the powerful outbursts sometimes show in the real world
while most times it just lies inside our heads,
fighting our emotions, fighting our feelings, and fighting what we want to think,
a positive thought can be overthrown easily by a negative thought
if we don’t build a wall in our mind to overthrow the negatives in our mind
because we have to remember thoughts are things
and thoughts create our reality
while thoughts fighting in our minds
become inner battles for what we want in our life,
everyone gives, everyone takes, and everyone battles,
about or but what is.
the door is always open, we just have to open every door,
we just have to be who we are,
with our neurodivergent brains,
with our disabled bodies or not disabled at the time,
and whether we choose to pass for neurotypicality
and how much we choose to be neurotypicality,
finally, it is our choice,
and from that choice,
we choose to make love or to take love,
even when its a rainy night or just clear skies,
all we have to do is make that decision and live with what we choose,
deciding the magic we want to deliver to the world,
with the love we have to give and share,
and see with our eyes the beauty we made
for the world to see and share everywhere.
All we want to do is make the love,
and open the doors wherever we see them.
What about love? What’s missing?
Open the doors!