Tag Archives: fear

A Poem Called “Silence”


by theamazinJ

It’s a quiet day,
a day of silence,
a day of mourning,
a day before the fight,
a day before the revolutionary war,
a day before civil unrest,
a day before civil disobedience,
a day to rest,
a day to boycott,
a day to protest,
a day to preserve spoons,
a day to preserve our energy,
a day to preserve the way we react,
a day to think logically,
a day to think rationally,
a day to not think emotionally.
One person cannot change everything,
everyone needs to agree to change,
It’s not I, the people,
It’s We, the People,
the people have spoken,
the people’s voices were silenced,
the voices were not enough against it
because we the people were ungrateful.
We took things for granted,
we allowed a man to push us around instead,
we allowed our hearts to melt,
we did not protect ourselves and our rights,
we became too argumentative and polarized
allowing our emotions to build up against each other,
by allowing a man to blind us with his thinking
allowing some to eventually vote for him
even with being blindfolded.
Some will never understand each other,
some will never understand what led to
the end of our voices being heard,
some will never understand this
and treat the rest of us as non-compliant
to the man who begins his power today.
The man who is named Donald Trump,
the man who set up his clones to
assist him to run the country,
a man who will never learn,
a man who will always think irrationally,
a man who could start a world war,
a man we all need to overthrow,
a man named Donald Trump who angers so many,
a man named Donald Trump who is too selfish,
and a man who is too similar
to too many past evil men in history.
Let’s fight, let’s not be complacent,
let’s begin the revolt,
and let’s begin to speak our voices
until that man is overthrown,
until the government finally listens,
and until we have what we want.
Nothing happens without a war sometimes,
Nothing about us, without us!

Every Day We Need to give Thanks and Give Back

I have been through the worst, I’ve been through the pains, I’ve even been through many heart aches in my life with people in general. People have failed me, people have been disappointing me, but most importantly I need to remember what I do in my life and what I have in my life of the people who support me. Sometimes I feel my voice, my intelligence, and my way of being are not acknowledged and listened to. Or, is that what it may seem like to me sometimes? I know there are many people who support me in my network including my family.

Thanksgiving is a day that was started that turned around over many years. It first started as a racist holiday against indigenous people. I suppose now people are trying to save Thanksgiving because they are turning it into a day to be grateful for everything we have and will have or had already. However, Thanksgiving should not be a day just to be grateful because we should always be grateful. Thanksgiving instead should be a day for everyone as a community in the world to come together to rejoice, rejuvenate, laugh, smile, and cry together. Sometimes it can be hard to, but we need to try to be around people to show who we are.

It’s a day that the whole community enjoys each other’s company and becomes fulfilled with life. It’s a day we should cherish regardless of it’s racist roots in history because we need to imagine ourselves always being the loving person most of our families tried to push us to become including mine. Love is something we all need. We all love, we all may need kisses, we all may need hugs, and we all need someone to connect to, to be a human being striving for our success.

Traditionally on Thanksgiving, people make huge feasts of food which includes grilling, baking, or frying turkeys. For every food we have, for every drink we drink, for every food and drink leftover, let’s think about the people who don’t have food during this holiday season. What happened to these people? Are they forgotten? Are they lost? Are they gone? The people I am talking about are still human who are not forgotten, not lost, and not gone, they are just here because for whatever reason no one understood them.

Love your family no matter what. Love the incredible things you get from the people around you. Yes, sometimes people in your family may disagree with us even when both sides of the argument think they are right. No matter what there is no right answer to an argument. People differ on issues because of everyone’s life experiences, philosophies, and observations of the world. The problem is that when someone is Disabled, many Non-Disabled people just don’t understand the life of a person who is Disabled. They only guess about what difficulties the disability community feels, and there could be back and forth calling names to each other, but this does not solve solve anything except a bigger battle. We need to accept that everyone has different viewpoints and every one has different things they have to say. No one needs to be silenced while they listen to one side of a story, instead everyone needs to understand the whole side of every story.

There is a lot of unrest in the world right now because of racism, because of ableism, because of ageism, because of sexism, because of heterosexism, because of classism, because of so many other ways of discrimination in the world. Yet, we need to forget about our egos, forget about who does what to who, and just remember that we are a community. A community who loves, a community of amazing individuals in the Human race, who cherishes everything we can ever do in the world. Sometimes it can be hard to drop our guards of anger and drop our fears we may have, but it is a necessary part of being human to be able to let it go to be free and happy.

I hope you love, I hope you are smiling, I hope if you are crying you have someone to hold onto, and if you are angry you can let it go to feel joy. Sometimes it’s hard, sometimes it’s messy, and sometimes we feel we cannot let go, however regardless of what we think we can’t do, we can always make our own choices. If we choose love, we don’t fear. If we choose fear, we become hateful. Most importantly, if we choose fear and anger, then we need to take a deep breath in, to allow are happiness in, to remember what humanity is all about; having community.

I know that many parents fear for their children who may have disabilities. It can be hard, it can be rough, it can be really difficult trying to figure out how to help their Disabled child. People need to remember to look at the many Disabled people who have been successful with the many aspects of their life as a means to ask questions and reach out for support. Disabled people need to listen to these parents so that they can give advice that matters. These parents need to listen to the advice instead of seeming to ignore the words of the disability community speaking up. Disability cultures exist which includes Autistic culture.

More importantly, this happens a lot in the autism community way too much. Parents look to researchers and other professionals for help instead of looking to Autistic people for the help they need. Researchers and other professionals need to work with us by listening to the Autistic people who can really give a better understanding of what it means to be on the autistic spectrum. One can only guess what it’s like if they are not on the spectrum themselves.

We need to be grateful that some researchers and other professionals have started doing this, but everyone also needs to slow down and breathe too. All in all, everyone who isn’t listening and learning to the Disabled including Autistic people, need to start now. In return, everyone can learn about about each other if only they listen to the things to be taught from those who are different from them. Then, only then, people everywhere will understand and accept a cultural difference that is different from who they are.

Hope everyone had a Happy Thanksgiving!!! Please listen, learn, and love the support network you have with the family that loves you no matter what. #lovenotfear

by the way…

This year is #GivingTuesday on December 2! This Giving Tuesday I hope you support The Autistic Self-Advocacy Network because A.S.A.N. really means to me the importance of community and accepting each other’s differences especially the cultural differences of Disability culture and Autistic culture. A.S.A.N. really is a breakthrough in the world because it really means that everyone who is Autistic or have other disabilities can express their voice or feelings of how they feel without being criticized. A.S.A.N. is about teaching the world what it means to understand each other’s cultural differences regardless of what they may be. It teaches everyone to be accepting even when it’s difficult to accept. Most importantly A.S.A.N. really teaches to love and educate people no matter who they are. The more people are educated, the more they will love, the less fearful and angry they become.

There are other organizations too that support Autistic people too. For example, they are Autism Women’s Network (AWN), Ollibean, Thinking Person’s Guide To Autism (TPGA), Association for Autistic Community, Autistic Community for Equality Facebook page, and G.R.A.S.P. (Global and Regional Autism Spectrum Partnership). When we think about cultures like Autistic culture, we need to think about supporting everyone without feeling like we are better than anyone else. We are all Human. We are all different and we are all learning from each other. The Autistic Rights movement only started about less 30 years ago, but we still have a long way to go.

I also trying to seek out funding for graduate school at CUNY. I started this crowdsourcing, to try to open up some doors. If anyone has any ideas for scholarship, please let me know!


It’s okay to cry, we are human, and we need to let go of fear

Sometimes my life feels very hurt by different people I meet in adulthood, but I am learning to advocate for myself more each day. It is good to be somewhere for some time, but eventually you have to move on. Moving on can be very difficult, but you can act out the moving on to make it easier for the real deal. I have been improving each day in the past year by telling people how I feel right away.

Imagine yourself in a situation when anyone for that matter is bullying you. You have a few choices. You can let the person continue to bully you by being weak, or you can stand up for your rights to the person who is bullying you by telling the person how inappropriate and hurtful they are being. By standing up, you will earn more respect and finally be treated fairly. The other choice is to flight or leave when the situation became so grim because you held inside all your fears. It is better to let go of your fears by telling the person how you feel right away in a assertive manner by not yelling or throwing fists or cursing. We must face our situation head on as soon as the problem arises. If the person or bully still does not understand how you feel, you must find a way to leave.

A lot of times bullies don’t feel good about themselves and feel hurt inside since they have fears of their own they need to face. Sometimes the fears they may have can be similar to the fears you may have when being victimized by them. The bullies project their fear(s) by using the fear as anger toward other people creating hate, pain, and suffering toward innocent people. There are many bullies in this world and practically all of them take on similar themes to what makes them bully an innocent person. A lot of times it is their way of standing up to their bully in their life (a chain reaction) by bullying others or sometimes it is a deeper fear inside. Deep down inside a bully is crying, but not showing it on the outside. Emotions can sit deep inside us building a tension which eventually explodes in anger. Remember to speak first and not let the emotion settle.

Today I want every one to say to themselves “It’s okay to cry. I am human.” Whatever fear you may have, just cry for a few minutes or however long you want to about the fear, then find a way to stand up assertively to the fear. If it is a fear of a particular animal, go up to the animal to find a connection. Life is curious with love. We can’t be afraid of love and we certainly need to be curious about our life.

One thing we all need to do is, live a life where we are doing something which makes us happy.

(Acting is a good way to figure out how to handle yourself in real life. Time for a day to act when I go to drama therapy class at the JCC Manhattan. It helps me since 2008 and I have seen myself grow better.)

posting soon enough,


A Lens of fear drives a person to insanity

Many people find they have doubt sighted in their vision. Doubt which has been driven by fear and what other people say. Sometimes you feel like a nut, but you don’t have to be a nut. If you stick your neck out and yell, “Get your hands off me and let me be me,” not literally random, but when its necessary. A lens of fear drives a person to insanity when they can not see who they are and want to be someone else. Loving kindness is very important for compassion, trust, and respect for who you are. Just remember the song “Say you, Say me” by Lionel Ritchie who says “Say you, say me; say it for always, Thats the way it should be…Believing who you are, you are a shining star!” Every one has their own star shining out there, but it is up to you to shine it bright.

Discover something about yourself today that you didn’t realize you had before. May be it was a passion you had when you were only 5 years old, and if you are 5 years old, hold that passion for the rest of your life. Stick to your gut feelings and you will be valued with success. Every one is meant to do something for this world, just look inside yourself.

An angel once will come up to you secretively out of nowhere to tell you “You live on this planet, you die on this planet, then you move forward to greater happiness.” Something out of nowhere will take you to your place where you will never go back to the fears you had before. You fear the unknown, you never live.

Thomas Jefferson once said

Never fear the want of business. A man who qualifies himself well for his calling, never fails of employment.

Now let’s take a look at what Einstein once said

Every day I remind myself that my inner and outer life are based on the labors of other men, living and dead, and that I must exert myself in order to give in the same measure as I have received and am still receiving.

The trouble is every day you wake up, you have to think to yourself, ‘What can do for myself today?’

Connecting, liberating, shocking the world with your passion in life!

My artwork coming soon…


A repute

Think about your reptutation and figure out how you want to better yourself.  It is very important to objectively look at the improvements you make on yourself.

First Emulate Regardless, Neither Any individual Nor Disrespectful Opinion can take this away from you.

This is what I learned from friends in my life.

Anyway, think about how to objectively look at yourself in the world.

Posting tonight,