It’s a thing,
It does not mean I need you in the way that you think,
It does not mean it is okay for you to touch me,
It does not mean I do not need you,
It just means I need you to listen to me now
in order to support me during meltdown.
Meltdown is a thing
and can occur at anytime without any warning,
it depends on how well you know yourself
not depending on others for constant need,
meltdown is a thing,
and it happens to every one every day
including Autistic people and others with disabilities,
the meltdown for people with disabilities
is much more different than those without disabilities,
we suffer greatly from the way society perceives us,
we suffer greatly because many others do not understand us
and try hard to support us in ways that do not help us,
meltdown happens and it is a thing,
there is a beginning, a middle, an end,
and a new beginning after the meltdown cycle,
meltdowns exist and they are real,
meltdowns exist and they can allow more growth,
meltdowns exist and they are not friendly at first,
but when its all done, has many rewards with consequences too.
Meltdowns, what more can I say?
Meltdowns exist and it happens to everyone,
meltdowns are different for the disability community
than it is for people without known disabilities in their life.
so, what can you do?
We can support disabled people in a different way
than what you may think,
Give us space, and accept boundaries especially during meltdowns,
give us things we need and let us just work it all out ourselves,
give us the ability to use our mind
to avoid giving too much support,
balance the way you think to help in the most way you can,
meltdowns exist and they are just what they are,
It does not mean a person can’t get up,
It just means they are down for the count
and will eventually get up to do there thing once again
like in a boxing match before the 10th count.
Meltdowns exist and they are important for everyone to grow,
Sometimes we get up right away,
and sometimes we get up just in the nick of time
before the 10th count,
so the important thing is to support, justify, and accept when things happen,
because when something bad happens, there is always something good
at the end of the tunnel, at sight of light in the distance,
and at the sounds of joy softly heard at the finish line
getting louder and louder as we get closer and closer,
we just need to survive and be the person we want to be
finding the support we want to have
with the people we love and the people we add to connect to,
and feeling the emotions we want to want,
to work it all out in our heads
to the congratulations at the end of our days
when we are old and gray.
I’m disabled,
I can do anything,
I need support,
More support than able-bodied people,
it does not mean I cannot see and do my successes,
it does not mean I will fail without you,
it just means I need more support than you do not need,
I have my mind,
A wonderful mind,
I have my body,
A wonderful body,
I have my dreams,
WONDERFUL dreams,
I have my life,
A wonderful LIFE,
I have my creativity,
that able-bodied people ignore,
I have my thoughts,
that are not influenced by any one,
I am not brainwashed,
and these thoughts are mine,
I am oppressed by society,
and I don’t think any one cares,
they keep disabled people down,
way way down,
Though, disabled people,
are smart,
are creative,
are inventive,
network for jobs (if you realize this or not),
or, actually can network, but
are mostly tossed aside,
can change the world (if you only allow us too),
and
know so much as a person
while NOT your inspirations,
while NOT your tragedies,
while NOT your burdens,
and
can flourish if you don’t keep us down,
down in day hab,
down in sheltered workshops,
down in low level jobs,
down in poverty,
down on the streets,
down with functioning labels,
keeping our voices down and silent,
tokenizing our voices,
not allowing us to choose what we want,
without allowing our voices to be heard,
only allowing our voices to be heard by a limit,
and, backing away as we speak our words,
as we teach the able-bodied community
what we think, what we see, and what we know,
most importantly,
we can teach everyone
that society needs to change,
society needs to experience us
from our points of view,
and society,
needs to finally learn
what disability really is, and really means.
Let’s begin the change,
let’s begin the way society will accommodate
offering accessibility to disabled people everywhere,
and
let’s begin to universally design a society
that listens to everyone,
works with everyone on their own achievements,
changing structures both physically and abstractly,
showing less selfishness in the world,
and more humble, gracious, and open communities
to disability and disabled people
from close by to afar.
I know that just because someone may be a very conservative or liberal or moderate, does not mean we can not have good communication with them. It really makes life more fun and interesting when we can talk to anyone regardless of how they are and differences they believe in. That’s part of neurodiversity. That’s acceptance and that’s a part of life. We need to accept everyone, everyone’s belief systems, everyone’s identities they have and what they choose for themselves, and accepting everyone’s self-determination of how they want to live their life.
It’s okay for someone to believe in the social model or the medical model, however, we can not tell a person how to live their life since that is not satisfying the requirements of being an individual. Individuality is important as we can not judge any one who decides on either model, on a particular identity, and/or a particular way they choose to live. We can not get angry, we can not get defensive, and we can not say we can not talk to any one who does not agree with us. We have to talk to people, because that is what neurodiversity is all about.
Neurodiversity activists and organizations are not really being very good activists as well as organizations like medical charity researchers and activists too who are also not being open with each other either. However, we all have to engage with each other without being stubborn, without being too hurtful, without being damned if we do or damned if we don’t, and carry on the wayward road moving forward. We need breakthrough with communication barriers that’s been going on for centuries even milleniums.
It does not matter if we disagree or agree. It does not matter if we agree or disagree with our President, agree or disagree with different philosophies or not, and even agree or disagree with the government we belong to or not. We have a government because that is what Americans (and humanity wanted all along) wanted back in 1700’s, so we need to accept that and move on as I hear how so many people seem distracted from their own belief systems and opinions. Our government is not perfect, but no one, thing, or situation is perfect either.
We live in an imperfect world with imperfect people in our community which means we can not escape the interactions with people or situations every moment of every day. We can only thrive at using our communications as going with the flow without trying to be perfect. It overwhelms us to pretend perfectionism exists, but the more we stop trying the more we become perfect. Though, as I said perfectionism does not exist, it exists once we forget that it does exist. Remember nothing is impossible, we all are possible all the time.
While let alone, we can not escape stigmas, stereotypes, and the way other people think too as I talk to someone in the community about this who feels the same way. Sarcasm is hard for many to deal with especially myself who is Autistic, however, sarcasm is something that is supposed to be humor, sometimes dark, sometimes light, but sarcasm indeed. It’s okay not to get or be attuned with sarcasm right away because not everyone understands it. Although sarcasm is just a way of life for some people and part of neurodiversity too.
Neurodiversity is also partly that some people are developmentally delayed in various different ways. Some people don’t go through the different stages of adolescence at the same time as everyone else is supposed to from the way mainstream culture says so. However, we need to realize that everyone is different, everyone is able, and everyone can do whatever it takes to live their life constructively. By living constructively, no one can feel pitied, put down, hurt, stigmatized, stereotyped, and/or feel pain from others.
Neurodiversity can flourish by not allowing ourselves to do this to other people and be open to other people’s perspectives. No one can do things on their own because everyone needs a group to do it together. No organization is perfect either that helps Disabled people in the whole broader disability community including in Autistic culture to help Autistic people. However, we all need to learn together and encourage each other to love every one of our good points so we can cancel out the negatives of everyone we meet. This is how neurodiversity can flourish. So, accept changes and be the community of sharing and caring. Be a good role model for others and others will do good for you.
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Please like and share Autistic Community for Equality Facebook page as this is an initiative that can further grow acceptance, forgiveness, and being less judgmental among each other in the world. The initiative is in it’s infant stage, but we can thrive a lot more as it becomes a bigger part of humanity and the rest of the world. Animals help us thrive too, and we need to realize that we can’t define any one as a friend or an enemy as the people that we are, are constantly learning and building our own way of life. We can not hate, we can only love the incredible people in our communities.
Please check out this website too, AASPIRE (Academic Autistic Spectrum Partnership In Research and Education) which medical charity organizations can learn from as they continue move forward too.
Thank you and please understand the things we all need to do to be an community sharing, loving, and caring for one another. So, reach out and talk to any one you want to talk to. Don’t worry about disagreeing, don’t be stubborn, and think about how we can all be strong together as part of the Animal Kingdom subset called being Human. Everyone needs to open the door toward our successful communications with each other, besides communications is key.
Listen to this song Des’ree “You Gotta Be”:
“You Gotta Be” by Des’ree
Listen as your day unfolds, challenge what the future holds
Try and keep your head up to the sky
Lovers, they may cause you tears
Go ahead release your fears, stand up and be counted
Don’t be ashamed to cry
You gotta be
You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser
You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together
All I know, all I know, love will save the day
Herald what your mother said
Reading the books your father read
Try to solve the puzzles in your own sweet time
Some may have more cash than you
Others take a different view, my oh my, heh, hey
You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser
You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together
All I know, all I know, love will save the day
Don’t ask no questions, it goes on without you
Leaving you behind if you can’t stand the pace
The world keeps on spinning
You can’t stop it, if you try to
This time it’s danger staring you in the face
Remember, listen as your day unfolds
Challenge what the future holds
Try and keep your head up to the sky
Lovers, they may cause you tears
Go ahead release your fears, my oh my heh, hey, hey
You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser
You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together
All I know, all I know, love will save the day
You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser
You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together
All I know, all I know, love will save the day
Everyone in society likes to be in control. Being in control of another person is not being a community. Everyone loves it because they feel they have power over others. This also creates entitlement, sadly. It means that people tend to love their ego over themselves that they lose sight of who they are. Ego controls not only the person, but can control others within the community as well. If a person loses control over others, they will do harmful things to society and/or themselves. The only control we should have is the control of ourselves while following the laws the community created. By controlling what we do without experiencing being in control or being controlled, we become a better person within the community.
So, how did Control start? What does being in control mean?
Control means from the dictionary, the power to influence or direct people’s behavior or the course of events. When a person is in control of others, they lose sight of their own humanity, and their ego gets in the way. However, controlling others is something that happens because everyone feels they can not trust their peers. To build trust in others, we need to all let go of our fears and build community.
Community means from the dictionary, a group of people living in the same place or having a particular characteristic in common. However, it’s more than that, community is supportive of each other, it’s building relationships, is giving each member of the community the right to speak their mind, is about listening to everyone, it is not having a leader controlling others while instead mediating others, and being happy for everyone in that community who shares with all their peers. Community is not having a leader, community is not having one person in control of the whole community, and not having people in the community living exclusively in richer love than the others. No one needs to use their own agenda as the laws for the community because everyone practices the community’s bill of rights and commandments that everyone feels they want from the community. Everyone votes on it and practices the laws. An agenda everyone has for themselves should be individualized for that person only to build self-determination.
Looking back in History, there has been much control over others losing sight of our own self. However, if we look back thousands of years ago when the first Human beings were around, we didn’t have governments set up, we didn’t have religions, and we certainly didn’t have people controlling each other. There were just small tribes in the world building up the Human race with their own faith. Everyone lived with self-determination, but their were no laws or rules. There was just our human nature. However, being able to create a safe community, leaders were created to ensure every member of the community had support for everyone’s needs and wants. If the majority of people wanted certain rules or laws to be created for a safe and supportive community, then the community needs to follow those laws. Laws change in the community with every generation. When generations collide on theories of law like in terms of what Humanity would need or want, we begin our free will to argue and fight. For example, the fight between the Autism and Autistic communities. As the community grew in the past and continues to grow, the people do too, but so do their egos. As egos grew stronger, controlling others began becoming stronger within the community. These laws are what we call government today with the leaders we vote for to fight for what we want and need in the country we live in.
The United States is a free country because it’s a country where it’s citizens can talk to each other about what laws we don’t like and what laws we do like. Laws need to be followed to help guide us with living our own life. Everyone needs to know that the laws help support and protect us at the same time. We can not have anarchy anywhere in the world because human nature does not allow us to since there is ego.
Now, the Human race is more than 5 billion individuals in the world with millions of communities for people to live in different governments, and we have lost sight of the first community thousands of years ago which began humanity. Everyone has different perspectives, everyone has different ways of doing things, and no body is being supportive in the communities anymore. Instead everyone wants to be in control. Society even created the media to control what people will see by controlling what they want us to understand about what goes on in the Human race.
All in all, the community who has their individual people with their properties and practices which make them the person they are, can trust each other gaining invaluable interaction and experience from each other. We as a whole community wherever we live in the world need to continue supporting and promoting safe space, secure home life, and rules everyone can follow. We all live in this world to encourage each other to fulfill our paths whatever we do to contribute without controlling any one.
Diversity exists! Life is very complex. Simplicity exists. We live in a complex-simple world. People seem to want to create a normal that never existed in the first place. A standard that would eradicate diversity and what the human experience is to the universe. The world is not that simple where there is not a so-called ‘Normal’ which exists. There is ethical standards everyone needs to understand, but every part of the human experience exists with diversity of how people experience their lives. Some people live their dreams, some people close their eyes while their destiny passes by, but that is everyone’s choice of how they want to live their life. People have choices plain and simple. The choice is clear, live to experience the positive wonders of the world or live a life of misery filled with struggle and pain. In the end if you choose the latter, you can always heal at any point in your life.
Life can be destructive if you allow to or life can be a beautiful experience until the day you reach your last breath soaking in the beautiful life you lived. The one thing other animals have over Human beings is living their life positively no matter what without thinking about it. Human beings can think freely communicating their actions with words by speaking, writing, or drawing. No matter who you are, you are a still Human with the ability to think. However, thinking is dangerous which led to many fights, wars, and disputes throughout the history of the Human race. Whatever happened to just being who we are and what we do to help contribute to the world. It’s time to come together, connect, and be who you are!
Sometimes we need to understand that the only thing we are right about is what gives us the passion to live. The passion to move on, the passion to sit still without thinking, and the passion to live our life the way we know we’ve always wanted to live it by contributing in a positive way. Some people don’t realize what their passion is for a long time, some people use other people’s passions, some people ignore passions, while others have always explored their passions living a famously remarkable life that everyone else wants. Not everyone has the same passions, while not everyone can be the same. However, everyone has different backgrounds from where they came from. Sometimes what we want to experience is not in our best interest to live a positive life. There are passions, there are jealousies, there are desires, and there are wants that are harmful to us. We use our free thinking to be able to discover what is right for us, and what is wrong for us. However, a lot of times many people want more than what they need to desire. Everyone has different desires that are unique to them.
We live in a diversified world where we live differently in different areas. We carry out laws in the different areas based on our own thinking. Sometimes it goes against our ethics and sometimes it doesn’t. I know we are learning to understand diversity better where, for example, soon marriage equality will be accepted everywhere. There will also soon be acceptance of how someone chooses to live too. It’s time to think about our life the way we need to live it in order to live it the way we always needed it to be. Be safe, live, think different, and use your creativity to live your life feeling uniquely positive in a way that we can feel good about things we have done.
It’s the end of July already and Autreat is on it’s way soon!