Sometimes we need to travel through our time finding out what word simply describes us or what we need most in our life. Moving forward day to day we appreciate who we are as a person accepting everything that represents who we are. Sometimes I wonder who I can be and discover the proportions of who I am. But, who are we anyway?
Today’s blog entry explores our inner feelings and subconscious emotions of what we may be afraid to express to some one else especially to a person you may want to go out with on a date. Its important to be open to yourself, your intuition, your inner ‘psychic’ feelings you may not want to express, and to be open to another person. Is it expressively necessary to be intimate with a person forming a bonding relationship of love?
I have liked certain women in the past I wanted to be with, but it just didn’t work out. On the contrary, there have been women who liked me in the past, but I didn’t feel the passion or the love they so wanted from me. Instead I just moved forward with my life to eventually be surprised. Is there any one now I can be in a relationship with? The answer is I haven’t met that person yet.
Will it be alright to move forward in life alone? or Do I really have to find that special someone to be intimate with? My feelings are its not really crucial to be in a relationship with someone at the moment, but as I talked it over today with my trusted mother, it may help make my life go more smoothly.
Loneliness is something that makes us feel ignored, but solitude is what makes us feel proud. I don’t think many people can survive feeling proudly in solitude. We live in a very sexual society and every where we go we see men kissing women, women kissing men, and now people are finally accepting same sex romance.
Romance is a particular relationship that helps give all of us in society a feeling of growth. No matter what kind of relationship it is and how much fighting, screaming, kisses, hugs, and/or sleeping in bed with your partner, you form a bond like no other. As that is what most people have said to me in the past even with today’s talk with my mom. Some things are just important to address like, which one am I? Am I someone who needs that kind of growth? I guess it is a part of growing pains.
I don’t know who I will meet in my future and I’d rather keep it a surprise because I am a journeyman in society who wants to keep it that way. Whoever that special woman is, who I can form a bond with, create my own family with is somewhere out there in society discovering who she is and what she wants too. Whether I will meet her in NY or elsewhere remains to be revealed in my future. Every thing is a surprise for me.
Capturing the hungry games of meeting a woman someday only makes me more and more eager to know when and where. I don’t think I can ever know exactly why?
Some people I know already come up to me and ask me “Have you met a woman yet?” or “C’mon already, what are you waiting for?” I am not waiting for anything. I just don’t want to be bombarded and shocked over the damn issue. When my time comes, it comes. Stop the nonsense and the impatience!!!
Reviewing my life to this point, I probably need to get out there more and go out and talk to those ladies I do like. Attraction is subjective, but you definitely have to mesh well. In addition, when you do get in to confrontation arguments with the person you love, you will still love them, cherish them, be with them no matter what. Boy will there be fights, but afterward there will also be greater love. Sometimes people say love just wasn’t enough, well, sometimes it isn’t, but at least you tried or may be it wasn’t true love after all. I guess I should give it a shot someday in the future, but for now I am content to be surprised.
As I learn to use my psychic intuition, my intuition tells me deep down inside, I’d rather be surprised than live my life knowing everything and obsessing about the future. It just not worth obsessing over.
When I am lying on my bed, old and gray, I will know I was fulfilled with a woman I eventually did love. Ultimately, once I do cross over, I will not be afraid any more…
(Friends are meeting and being in relationship with a woman which is made think of this topic)
(posting more soon)
OUT, J