Think of it like a commerical on television first. When TV commercials are on they are only one for a certain amount of time like 30 seconds or a bit more depending on the commercial and that is their boundary. If they exceed longer than that it cuts into the main event of the night which is your telelvison show you want to watch.
When you call someone up on the phone, it is like the same thing only you are dealing with a single individual where each single individual has different levels of their boundaries.
Well, there are certain rules I am finding out for now and once and for all. That is, if you call someone up at work, it is not to chit chat but to ask a serious question like an emergency for a friend to help out with or a serious question that only that person can answer. Usually it is of someone you can trust who can give you the advice you want to have, but in the end you have to make up your own mind.
For one thing is, you can’t spend every waking hour calling every one and anyone you know to talk to them. You must decide who are those people you want to talk to most of the time, and those you talk to every once in a while.
It is a judgment that you must make based on realistic judgments. If you know someone calls you on a regular basis, you have to determine if that person is worth your time or not.
If the person has an intellectual conversation with you, then it is worth it in my mind. If they are not having an intellectual conversation than it is not worth it in my mind. Yet, every one thinks differently and has different aspirations in life. Some people I talk to have very very dirty minds, while others I talk to are very very clean. I like to talk very intellectually and not so much the latter.
The more I can learn something new, the better in my mind.
Yet, there is another aspect of all of this, are people just talking to push anxiety on to someone else to become anxiety ridden?
If so, STOP, think, and use the anxiety in a different way like meditation and/or exercise.
People talk for different reasons some are good and others are bad.
I spoke with a friend yesterday morning who whenever I talk to this person lately he tries to lecture me on things I already know, yet may be he is just wants to reinforce it in my head.
There are so many things that requires boundaries in this world and they”re people in this world that do not understand them.
Boundary making for yourself is important so that people respect you. Boundary making is important so that you and others have a sense of respect for you and others vice versa.
posting later on,