Tag Archives: disability

A Poem Called “I am not retarded”

I am not retarded,

by theamazinJ

I can think for myself,
I have a mind of my own,
I am a Masters student,
I am a filmmaker,
I am an artist,
I am a poet,
I am a person,
I am not less than what you think,
I am an independent citizen,
I need support like everyone else,
I am capable even though I am disabled,
disability does not mean I am hidden from society,
disability does not mean I cannot say “I am disabled and proud”
disability does not mean my voice does not matter,
disability does not mean I can’t do anything,
disability means I need to structure my supports
and build a supported decision making agreement
between my supporters
as myself being the decision maker
like you and you and you in the world.
I disagree with people
as much as I agree,
I do not agree with you on some things,
but I agree on other things,
and that’s okay.
I can speak out on what I believe and feel
an that’s ok because it’s how I feel
and it does not mean
I am too easily influenced or ‘brainwashed’
because being ‘brainwashed’ is not even a thing,
it is a social construction, it is not even real,
and it is figure of speech of
someone’s imagination to make a person seem crazy,
to make a person feel disregarded as a person,
and to not allow a person to take responsibility for their choices
even if the person felt at the time
to choose something for their own self-care,
even if it was for their own way of
making meaning with the world,
my own way of growing and maturing
and doing things on my own,
to get to an understanding of what
I can do without the world telling me otherwise
as if I need to always be told
as if I am child and not the adult that I am.
Presuming competence is so important,
it is so liberating for everyone
because the social model of disability
is not about discrediting medicine,
it is about self-determination
it’s about de-stigmatizing what the medical model did,
so disabled people make their decisions
and using accommodations even it is from medicine
to help a person live their life,
even if they need other accessibilities
to do this as well,
even if many do not understand the
social model of disability,
that’s ok, but please don’t discredit it,
don’t discredit an individual’s right to make decisions
based on how they may feel at the time,
allow leeway in may be taking responsibility
for why the individual chose that decision at the time,
may be it wasn’t all about the individual’s behavior
maybe it could have been the way
the individual felt from the behavior
of the people around them.
Relationships are a two way street.
Everything that happens is never one sided,
it is never the fault of one person,
everyone can always take responsibility for
every decision that is made by an individual.
There is a reason why things happen,
and sometimes that reason needs to be known,
sometimes the reason is projected on the decision maker
because the other people don’t want to
feel bad or don’t want to know they might have done
something wrong.
There is never what someone did was wrong
like there is never what someone did was right.
Every decision we make is something we did
from how we felt at the time.
Everywhere we go, every decision we make,
are decisions that may have been
tough for us to make,
but it was decisions from our path
to help us grow,
to help us mature,
and to help us further our destiny
to live our life.
Every decision an individual makes
is by how we felt
and whoever was around the individual at that time
including the individual
who needs to take responsibility for that decision.
Take responsibility for yourself
and most importantly take responsibility
for every other person as a decision maker
regardless of who the person is or was
even if person is disabled or
even if the person is non-disabled.
It’s not all about you or them,
it’s all about the decision that was made.

A Poem Called “Nothing About Us”

Nothing About Us,

by theamazinJ

Everywhere we go,
everywhere we look,
We see destruction,
we see walls being built,
we see the development of institutions,
we see the lack of community building,
everywhere we go we see Donald Trump’s face
in place of the faces from the 1930’s,
where in 1927, Oliver Wendell Holmes
from the U.S. Supreme Court
finished what was started in America
where the dark history of America
helped stir the pot in Germany back then,
where even today
many people still keep in mind
what American History is really about,
keeping the rich richer,
and about building a fascist state of mind,
while The U.S. Supreme Court in 1927
from Buck Vs. Bell
secured a statement
that is still in everyone’s minds today
stirring the message over and over in their heads.
The message was clear, the message was disturbing,
and the message was concrete,
when Holmes said “Three Generations of Imbeciles were enough…”
It allowed the preconceived notion
that the medical model of disability will dominate,
it also allowed Americans
to build a war against each others
against society
and against disability
while at the same time
trying to prevent disability
and not only that,
but eventually labeling
everyone ‘high’ functioning or ‘low’ functioning,
and even establishing medical charity organizations
to this day
to use this rhetoric from Buck vs. Bell
even more than they had done before
to establish a society of sameness,
a society of perfect bodies,
a society where there would be lethal forced euthanasia,
a society where there would be eradication of certain peoples,
and a society segregating people
by class, by gender, by race, by sexuality, by ability,
and by religion.
This is the society Donald Trump wants,
this is the society that Paul Ryan hopes for,
this the society Mitch McConnell strives for
and what Mike Pence asserts every day.
We need to stop this from happening,
we need to embrace every part of humanity
every day of our lives,
with supporting each other,
and encouraging everyone
while remembering
why we are here on this planet,
and how we can rely on each other everyday for support.
Society is interdependent,
we are not finches,
we cannot take Darwin literally when he said
it’s ‘Survival of the Fittest’,
because humanity is different,
humanity is supported,
we support one another,
we support other animals,
we support other kingdoms of taxonomy,
we support the climate of this great planet,
if someone is sought out to destroy this diversity
then we need to sought out justice to the people
wanting to harm and wanting to do this,
because we need to construct
a world of love for this planet
and everything and everybody that is on it,
no one can take that away
and no one can segregate or harm another,
in the end,
its our duty to take care of one another
regardless of who or what we are,
regardless of what kinds of supports
the person needs to achieve their own self-determination,
because we cannot be influenced by
Donald Trump’s establishment or Paul Ryan’s anger or Mitch McConnell’s fury,
or even Mike Pence’s ignorance,
To be truly United,
we need to include everyone,
we need to build community,
because disability is part of the human experience,
but is also part of living organisms,
and we need to remember,
Nothing about us, without us
is Nothing about US.
Everyone supporting one another, is not controlling anyone regardless,
that’s what democracy is really about.

A Poem Called “It’s Not About Inspiration”

It’s Not About Inspiration,

by theamazinJ

Jerks, Assholes, Taunters, Real,
Inspiration?
We can all be jerks,
we can all be assholes,
we can all be taunters,
We are all real,
but we are all not inspirations.
I am not your inspiration,
and you are no body’s inspiration.
Inspiration is being a jerk,
inspiration is a being an ass,
inspiration is being a bully,
inspiration taunts us,
inspiration is not being real,
inspiration is being anything but real.
Disabled people are not your inspiration.
Autistic people are not your inspiration.
Inspiration is real, yes, but
we need to think of it as something within us,
not from outside of us.
Inspiration, yes?
No, inspiration, no.
Everyone is a jerk at some point during the day.
Everyone spins what they want others to understand about life.
So, why pity someone for who they are?
So, why not act like everyone is a person, disabled or non-disabled alike?
Disabled people are jerks just as much as able-bodied people are!
Disabled people are citizens just as much as you are.
I am disabled, but I am a citizen.
It does not matter what impairments or how severe the impairments can be,
no matter who you meet, everyone is a citizen.
The more we think this, the more we act it,
the more we remember being a citizen has many attributes,
whether able-bodied or disabled.
As a disabled person who can be an asshole or be a understanding person,
or as a able-bodied person who can be the same,
disability does not mean lacking humanity or being more than humanity,
disability is humanity.
Disability has varying degrees of impairments,
and impairments can be expensive to support depending on what is impaired
and how severe the impairment.
When thinking of being human, let’s think of all the variables of being human,
there are times when people are smart,
there are times when people can act stupid,
there are times when people can be an ass,
there are times when people can be a moron,
there are times when we people don’t think things through,
there are times when everyone plans out everything,
everyone takes disability too seriously and tragically,
when disability can affect anyone at any time in their life,
depending on when it strikes, what it strikes, and how it strikes,
depends on how the person reacts to disability.
There is no more putting down disability,
there is no more thinking disability is more than life,
there is no more disability is the end of life as we know it,
because disability is what makes life interesting,
it’s what makes life real,
it’s what makes human life being human
and being mortal and being imperfect
in a world that is constantly changing,
in a world that is rapidly transitioning,
and in a world that needs to normalize disability
as being the norm of humanity.
So, in universally designing society
we need to design structures and events
to allow however a person moves,
however a person communicates,
and however a person learns
to allow a person to applaud and flapplaud simultaneously
and allow a person to sign, talk, and use assistative technology
with ease without lurking, without staring, and without belittling or teasing,
because in the end,
universal design is about recognizing everyone however they are,
and not enabling them to be martyrs,
without enabling them to be inspirations,
and just letting everyone live the life they want to live
with their families, with their friends, and with their communities,
with the self-determination they want to self-direct their life with
even if it is choosing to live in the community
or choosing to live in a congregate setting.
Finally, its the choices that we learn from
that makes up our humanity.

A Poem Called “No Regrets”

No Regrets,

by theamazinJ

Every experience we had,
every experience we have,
is neither bad nor worse,
every experience I had happened for a reason,
every experience I have I experience to grow,
no matter what anyone says or thinks
does not matter,
I grow from every experience everyday.
I grow because it helps me,
I grow because I am human,
and I grow to reach higher ground.
Some may not understand
especially since I am a disabled person,
since I have multiple disabilities
mainly invisible,
yet, everyone still knows I am human growing everyday.
Seeking support in different ways than I have,
ultimately making my decisions on my own,
because I have a mind of my own,
and every time I make a decision
it is always about how I feel at the time,
it’s always about what I need at the time,
and it’s always something I needed to grow from.
I have no regrets, and no body should,
even if we leave for a while
to do something we need to do for ourselves,
to do something that we feel we need to grow more,
to learn from to understand more about ourselves,
even if many others do not understand why,
even when others don’t understand what’s going on,
whether a disabled person or someone who is non-disabled
sets out on their own,
everyone needs their time for solace,
everyone needs to their time to listen to the inner voice,
everyone needs time sometimes to just do something,
because the time we have is all we’ve got,
the time we always had is all that we need to enhance ourselves.
As an Autistic disabled person who,
is disabled by default from a society who
does not understand the disability of autism,
and even invented and created the words.
Growth happens no matter what,
some may resist others’ growth,
some may say some disabled people cannot grow,
some may say having disability does not mean a person can grow,
some may say having disability is tragic sad thing,
some may say having disability means learning from those who are non-disabled,
some may not think of the implications of what they think
because it is overlooked,
instead therapies like ABA and social skills training
is generally mostly used rather than remotely used for specific ideals,
for specific impairments early on in life.
Sometimes we grow from each other,
but sometimes we need to grow by ourselves.
Others may be upset, crying, and angry,
about what the individual chose and what they wanted to
and how to grow from,
whatever the individual chose is self-determination and the social model,
regardless, and growing is an experience,
and there are no regrets from me,
and there should not be any regrets from anyone’s experiences
regardless of being autistic or not,
and no one should feel bad about any choice or experience they had.
In the end, it’s all about being self-aware,
it’s all about what we kinds of supports we need at the time,
and it’s all about having our intuition
to know ourselves,
and sometimes the support is just giving space,
understanding the boundary we set
to eventually come back a better person.
There is no regrets.

The Disability community needs services to ensure success in life

Either we have services or we don’t have services, but what happens when we do or don’t have services…

It’s a CATCH-22!

Needing services and using the services:

1) Not having your own voice
2) Having your needs always met as a dependent for life
3) Being pitied with despair
4) Not having your own way of doing things accomplished with self-determination
5) Always being spoken to as a child

Not having/using services:

1) Being told you have to do everything on your own
2) Not having certain minimal services you need
3) Being told you don’t have a disability or you are not Autistic, etc.
4) struggling keeping up with everyday life skills
5) being told you are so-called ‘normal’ or just like everyone else

Either way it is a struggle for a Disabled person to live their life needing or not needing services. So, when is society going to understand disability? Society needs to give people who need the services the necessary things to ensure self-determination for success. Services are very important for my peers and I.

The social model of disability goes unnoticed because many people in the world look at the medical model as the key component in helping the disability community. Yet, the medical model of disability does not allow others to work with self-determination because medical professionals treat the disability rather than the person. They try behaviorist methods and medicine without having the person work on their own terms toward success. Society seems to not expect a Disabled person to live the way a Able person or Non-Disabled person can.

Every one has every right to be involved in their treatment plans whether they have a documented disability or not. Everybody has their own mind, their own body, and their own soul which gives them the strength to live their life. Many times due to many of society’s many people who we interact with, have dealt with abuses, neglect, and/or bullying which hurt self-esteem. In my opinion, this could be the reason why the medical model is continuously used to treat the disorder/disability rather than the person. The medical model also adapted thinking where everyone labels each other with something. This is called Eugenics.

Once society accepts disability, society will understand how to react to it and engage with those who have a disability much better.

Let’s start learning and finally accepting disability in Humanity!

OUT, J