Tag Archives: Autistic culture

Supporting the Decisions Everyone Makes No Matter What Varying Impairments Anyone May Have including Autistic people

Supporting the Decisions for Everyone No Matter What Varying Impairments Anyone May Have Including Autistic People

Autistic people have rights just the way everyone has rights to be a leader of their life; Autistic people are thinking the way they want to think and are also human beings too with our own mind. Autistic people have feelings often feeling for others and have feelings that often feel pain by many other people who do not understand us. Autistic people grow up at different paces while others may just grow at the same pace as their physical age. Because many Autistic people grow at different paces, we are often thought of as less than human, deviant from the norm, and due to our impairments many in society look down upon us thinking we do not have a mind of our own nor are we able to make logical decisions about the life we want.

Though, Autistic people are vulnerable, and depending on the impairments, depend on how vulnerable the individual will be. It does not matter if the person is less impaired, they can be more vulnerable. Just because Autistic people are vulnerable does not mean we are not our own person. May be so many think that way because Autistic people feel so many emotions at once, that at times we either do not know how to use our emotions scaling back inward or use our emotions too much being considered to be over-emotional, rageful, and illogical. Whichever way Autistic people are, we are misunderstood by society as a whole, thus society is misguided in the way everyone should think of Autistic culture and human society in general.

Despite all of the misunderstandings and misguided ideas from years of a perception that someone with cognitive impairments is not capable, some in society are finally learning today what person centered really means. Yet, many do not presume competence. The tragedy of the thinking that Autistic people don’t have a mind capable like others has created in the past, a blood boiling battle scene between Autistic people and many others who striving for a way of conformity. Lately, the people who get the most credit for starting this battle scene is the organization, Autism Speaks. However, they are not the only ones who need to take responsibility for this battle scene between Autistic and non-autistic.

Many people before Autism Speaks have contributed to this blood boiling war between Autistic people and others who strive for perfection. Unfortunately, the mainstream media has contributed to this as well by mostly taking the sides of people who are against Autistic culture. This war against Autistic people is really a war against humanity and human nature, yet it should not have polarized thinking. The battle to fight for either correcting the genome from disability to embracing the genome and realizing cognitive disabilities like the way Autistic culture is, is something that needs to be accepted.

How far do we go to changing the human genome? Is it our right to change the genome that mutates and changes randomly over time? Who gets to say which parts of the genome are bad or not? And, is the human genome really a bad thing as many medical researchers are trying to correct it to make a perfected flawless human being? Is eugenics or genetic counseling really needed?

My feelings as a person who is Neurodivergent from outside the norms of society and as an Autistic person leads me to believe that I often feel like pushing to be who I am while getting pull back from society to make me the same as how others are. The fine line between autonomy and being who we are versus depending on others to conform to the standards of society is enormously thick, yet we need to pull one way and push another to be included in the community. Autism Speaks as an organization has been through a rough war because many people feel their misguided thinking for almost 12 years has been too hurtful to many who feel they want to embrace who they are regardless. This makes me feel that not just Autism Speaks, but everyone needs to re-think what we have done in the past that preyed on too many people and in some ways continue to do so.

Our society created the mindset of the perfect mind and body back when Francis Galton created the word ‘eugenics’ and the world decided that between Darwin’s evolutionary theory and his cousin, Galton and his creation of the word ‘eugenics’, that everyone became instantly obsessed with the human genome. To perfect the body and mind is to deny disability and separate from the imperfect human body to create a monster master race of the human genome that everyone will strive to be. This monster master race that everyone has been striving for since the late 19th Century, created the thinking that Hitler wanted to first exterminate people with varying degrees of impairments to eventually exterminating certain races, religions, and other peoples in the Holocaust because he thought society could do away without these differences.

I am sorry to say, but the world created the way Hitler eventually started the Holocaust when he thought about how to perfect the human genome, race, and religion and whether we like it or not. We create people like the way Hitler was in the world. However, this is not the only thing we need to take responsibility for, we also need to take responsibility for many other things throughout history both in our private lives and in the public.

Everyone is vulnerable in society, but we need to use that in a different way then the way we have been being vulnerable in the past. Supporting decisions that individuals make in the world is figuring out what will affect both the individual and society in a positive way. It is not about conforming to others, it is about being a leader of your own life. We just need to be vulnerable in the way we affect others and ourselves in the decisions we make in our life.

Much of society has been vulnerable to perfect a human genome that is constantly mutating, constantly changing, and constantly moving around in our bodies just like the universe is constantly moving. We can possibly change that, but we cannot stop that. Many people are obsessed with perfecting (and perfected) bodies and minds. However, perfecting a body and mind, is a very fine line between what we think is autonomy and what we think we need to depend on others for help. As society builds communities, we are connected to each other regardless of the way we identify through race, religion, sexuality, gender, or disability cultures. The way we represent ourselves is independent of being human because being human really means that we need to support one another regardless of what we want to influence since we all go through the same trials, tribulations, and rewards in life to form our identities and ideas.

Supporting decisions and the way we as individuals experience life is important. The person centered approach most are beginning to learn now, is something that is a part of human nature since the beginning of time. Yet, we have in the past, and in some ways still do, only respect the decisions some people make, while others we felt could not make decisions at all and could not think on their own. This is still is still happening today.

We need to give everyone the tools to decide and think about what they want in their life on their own even if it can be difficult with some individuals. This thinking presumed (and in some ways continues to presume) many people that their decisions are illogical and not right. Making decisions for our life depends on what kinds of decisions we are making. Some decisions we can decide on our own, but many other decisions we need the support from people we feel can assist us especially those close to us in making the best decision for making our life a success. There is always someone we can speak to that can help weigh the pros and cons of a decision in our life. For those who have more severe impairments, we need to help them as well to make their own decisions that are right for them regarding what the individual wants.

Whenever anyone makes a decision, it not only affects us, but it also affects everyone close to us in that decision, and in some ways can affect the rest of society as well. For example, when any one decides that they want to change the way their child is, they are making a conscious decision that will affect the way their child will feel about themselves and toward others as well. These decisions we make affect us individually in many different ways. If a child rebels against their parent’s decision to change who they are, then the child and the parents must take responsibility for their actions.

Deciding on changing the way a person is, also changes the way everyone feels about themselves. It is important to attribute every decision we make to the way we think about others and ourselves in our life. When we think about who we are as a person, we think about where we came from, and the people in our life that affect what we think. Sometimes what we think can hurt who we are and/or other people especially those close to us.

Though, the way we think depends on our experiences. For example, if we spitefully act because we think we want to hurt someone emotionally or physically, we essentially hurt ourselves in the process. The golden rule still stands to do good to others always, however, sometimes what we think is doing good in our mind, may be hurting others without even thinking it through. This is definitely true when Galton created eugenics that eventually became the study of genetics that led to the thoughts many people have had since then that has hurt society.

Autism Speaks may not have been thinking through in the past how they are helping Autistic people in society may not be actually helping Autistics everywhere, but they hopefully are starting to learn. However, every non-profit organization has been thinking irrationally including the Autistic Self-Advocacy Network and many other Self-Advocacy organizations that also seem to not think about the way everyone feels. Yet, the self-advocacy and the Neurodiversity movements that were started by self-advocates helped (and continues to help) the parent movement begin to understand things every day.

Every organization has their own agenda to what they think they are doing is right. Yet, everyone and every organization, through medical charity or self-advocacy, cannot know exactly how everyone feels because we all have our own thoughts and experiences, that are different than others and ourselves.
When thinking about supported decision-making, everyone thinks about the way they want to live their life. For example, an individual may choose a different way of living than many other people do on an actual daily basis, but that does not mean that individuals in society cannot live a quality life. A quality life is subjective to what an individual actually feels they want in their life. No one can suggest a better quality of life or social skills to make others conform to a society that is not universally designed for everyone. We need to accept and protect the boundaries we individually make ourselves to the way others set their boundaries too. We need to remember who the person is as an individual and how individuality really is what everyone wants as a single mind of their own.

Society can lead to too much frustration because of a social construction of conformity to make everyone the same, as followers. Some may be more frustrated with who they are than others because their experiences with how society treated them or certain individuals who treated them in the past made them feel particularly unjustified and unaccepted living their life. This responsibility is what everyone needs to fully grasp and think about how to create a unified world with justice served.

Everyone has their own way of living. Everyone has their pride and joy that makes them feel good about who they are. Everyone does what is right for them, but no one has a right to tell a person that the way they are living is not quality of life and not conforming. Conforming is living in a world that is universally designed to fit everyone even if society does not understand that type of conformity. Many times some impairments create situations that make a person feel they cannot function enough and in fact need accessibility and universal design to help them get by or even thrive in society. So, why cannot we create universal design in everything we do in society so that everyone feels that they can live their life the way they know best? That is a good question because our society has always conformed to the idea that its citizens are too vulnerable and need to be corrected (or fixed) to fit in.

The world is a tough place to live in. Autistic people can be vulnerable, mostly, everyone is different to the person standing next to them, and simultaneously we can all be vulnerable to what others are thinking. However, it does not mean as individuals that vulnerability is a weakness. Everyone is an individual who can think on their own and are susceptible to others in the way many think.

Human culture is defined; all of us think whoever is standing out in that moment yelling their voice the loudest and often ranting a lot, is the leader. This is not true, we are all leaders of our own life, and self-directing, as we all need to believe that we are happy with who we are and connecting with others. The vulnerability everyone has is just a strength we have that we need to show others that we need support. So, we all get to support the decisions we all make in the best possible life we all want, including Autistic people.

In order to think through how to create more positive experiences with others in society, we can help by providing to strive for universally designing a world that everyone can live in with dignity, respect, getting their voices heard, and able to function with everyone else around them no matter what. Everyone can lead their own life whatever way they want to live. We need to do better and we need to ease the pains of so many people especially in our society, including Autistic and non-autistic alike.

10 ways Non-autistic people tell Autistic people to Pass For Normal is Stigmatizing and Does Not Allow For Authenticity

1) When an Autistic person is told to pass for normal, we are usually told AAC is not allowed to communicate with others. The people we interact with tell us that we must speak through our mouths.
2) When an Autistic person moves differently through ticks and stimming and the way we walk down the street, we are told that we must not do that and in fact must ‘Quiet Hands’.
3) When an Autistic person desires to be by themselves, non-autistic people think it’s weird, unusual, and/or strange making us look like freaks and weirdos.
4) When an Autistic person fulfills a dream of a painting, writing, music, inventions, or other special interests so the world can enjoy something from us, we are often told we are obsessing over things and to enjoy life without thinking.
5) When an Autistic person wants to spend time with animals more than people, we are told to spend more time with people.
6) When an Autistic person prefers to hang out with other Autistics because we feel less pressure to pass we are often told our Autistic friends are too weird.
7) When an Autistic person interacts with non-autistic people, we are told we lack the social skills necessary to interact with them. However, we are often not taught the real social skills (check out the REAL social skills) and often are only taught social skills from a child-like or very basic thing.
8) When an Autistic person is advocating for themselves and the Autistic community, we are often told we are being rebellious, obstinate, or misbehaving.
9) When an Autistic person uses their voice to speak, we are often told to lower our voices or raise our voices. We are never encouraged to use AAC (Augmentative and Assistive Communication devices) unless a non-autistic person truly has trouble understanding the Autistic person. Then, the non-autistic person typically mocks or mimics the Autistic person who uses AAC.
10) All too often Autistic people are mocked or mimicked for being Autistic and used as the ‘joke’ or for ‘comedy’.

By these Non-autistic ways toward Autistic people, we are far too often not allowed to be our authentic selves. Autism is a different way of life, it is a different dialect, different language, different way to move, and different sensory experience. Every Autistic person expresses autism differently. That is the beauty of Autistic culture.

Believe it and hopefully those non-autistic people stop making Autistic people feel too anxious to ‘pass’ for a normal that is too stigmatizing from the medical model. Thus, we are far too often stereotyped as well and for those Autistic people who do try to conform to the normal way from society are far too often objectified or seen as ‘posters of inspiration porn’.

AAC is important to me for communicate like any other Autistic person, but like many others like myself have always been told to ‘pass’ instead.

OUT, J

Accepting Changes in Our Life can be HARD, Let’s do it anyway!

I know that just because someone may be a very conservative or liberal or moderate, does not mean we can not have good communication with them. It really makes life more fun and interesting when we can talk to anyone regardless of how they are and differences they believe in. That’s part of neurodiversity. That’s acceptance and that’s a part of life. We need to accept everyone, everyone’s belief systems, everyone’s identities they have and what they choose for themselves, and accepting everyone’s self-determination of how they want to live their life.

It’s okay for someone to believe in the social model or the medical model, however, we can not tell a person how to live their life since that is not satisfying the requirements of being an individual. Individuality is important as we can not judge any one who decides on either model, on a particular identity, and/or a particular way they choose to live. We can not get angry, we can not get defensive, and we can not say we can not talk to any one who does not agree with us. We have to talk to people, because that is what neurodiversity is all about.

Neurodiversity activists and organizations are not really being very good activists as well as organizations like medical charity researchers and activists too who are also not being open with each other either. However, we all have to engage with each other without being stubborn, without being too hurtful, without being damned if we do or damned if we don’t, and carry on the wayward road moving forward. We need breakthrough with communication barriers that’s been going on for centuries even milleniums.

It does not matter if we disagree or agree. It does not matter if we agree or disagree with our President, agree or disagree with different philosophies or not, and even agree or disagree with the government we belong to or not. We have a government because that is what Americans (and humanity wanted all along) wanted back in 1700’s, so we need to accept that and move on as I hear how so many people seem distracted from their own belief systems and opinions. Our government is not perfect, but no one, thing, or situation is perfect either.

We live in an imperfect world with imperfect people in our community which means we can not escape the interactions with people or situations every moment of every day. We can only thrive at using our communications as going with the flow without trying to be perfect. It overwhelms us to pretend perfectionism exists, but the more we stop trying the more we become perfect. Though, as I said perfectionism does not exist, it exists once we forget that it does exist. Remember nothing is impossible, we all are possible all the time.

While let alone, we can not escape stigmas, stereotypes, and the way other people think too as I talk to someone in the community about this who feels the same way. Sarcasm is hard for many to deal with especially myself who is Autistic, however, sarcasm is something that is supposed to be humor, sometimes dark, sometimes light, but sarcasm indeed. It’s okay not to get or be attuned with sarcasm right away because not everyone understands it. Although sarcasm is just a way of life for some people and part of neurodiversity too.

Neurodiversity is also partly that some people are developmentally delayed in various different ways. Some people don’t go through the different stages of adolescence at the same time as everyone else is supposed to from the way mainstream culture says so. However, we need to realize that everyone is different, everyone is able, and everyone can do whatever it takes to live their life constructively. By living constructively, no one can feel pitied, put down, hurt, stigmatized, stereotyped, and/or feel pain from others.

Neurodiversity can flourish by not allowing ourselves to do this to other people and be open to other people’s perspectives. No one can do things on their own because everyone needs a group to do it together. No organization is perfect either that helps Disabled people in the whole broader disability community including in Autistic culture to help Autistic people. However, we all need to learn together and encourage each other to love every one of our good points so we can cancel out the negatives of everyone we meet. This is how neurodiversity can flourish. So, accept changes and be the community of sharing and caring. Be a good role model for others and others will do good for you.

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Please like and share Autistic Community for Equality Facebook page as this is an initiative that can further grow acceptance, forgiveness, and being less judgmental among each other in the world. The initiative is in it’s infant stage, but we can thrive a lot more as it becomes a bigger part of humanity and the rest of the world. Animals help us thrive too, and we need to realize that we can’t define any one as a friend or an enemy as the people that we are, are constantly learning and building our own way of life. We can not hate, we can only love the incredible people in our communities.

Please check out this website too, AASPIRE (Academic Autistic Spectrum Partnership In Research and Education) which medical charity organizations can learn from as they continue move forward too.

Thank you and please understand the things we all need to do to be an community sharing, loving, and caring for one another. So, reach out and talk to any one you want to talk to. Don’t worry about disagreeing, don’t be stubborn, and think about how we can all be strong together as part of the Animal Kingdom subset called being Human. Everyone needs to open the door toward our successful communications with each other, besides communications is key.

Listen to this song Des’ree “You Gotta Be”:

“You Gotta Be” by Des’ree

Listen as your day unfolds, challenge what the future holds
Try and keep your head up to the sky
Lovers, they may cause you tears
Go ahead release your fears, stand up and be counted
Don’t be ashamed to cry

You gotta be
You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser
You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together
All I know, all I know, love will save the day

Herald what your mother said
Reading the books your father read
Try to solve the puzzles in your own sweet time
Some may have more cash than you
Others take a different view, my oh my, heh, hey

You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser
You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together
All I know, all I know, love will save the day

Don’t ask no questions, it goes on without you
Leaving you behind if you can’t stand the pace
The world keeps on spinning
You can’t stop it, if you try to
This time it’s danger staring you in the face

Remember, listen as your day unfolds
Challenge what the future holds
Try and keep your head up to the sky
Lovers, they may cause you tears
Go ahead release your fears, my oh my heh, hey, hey

You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser
You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together
All I know, all I know, love will save the day

You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser
You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together
All I know, all I know, love will save the day


OUT, J

What Being a Self-Advocate means, and it’s Not Being Objectified

Inspiration Porn is when society objectifies Disabled people in the community like Autistic people have been objectified for the past 10 years especially by organizations like Autism Speaks. Inspiration porn is creating stigma by objectification because society thinks disability is shameful, that it is destructive, that is a tragedy, a burden, and a negative thing that should not exist. However, society is wrong!

Please watch Stella Young’s amazing video from last year. Every time I have seen this video since it first came out, to educate others has explained specifically why objectifying anyone is not good and not healthy for anyone in the human race.

Disability does exist, Disability will exist, Disability has existed since the dawn of time. Why? Because Disability is a part of the human experience and no one, I mean no one can take that away from anyone in this world especially when d/Disability is what makes us human. In addition, let’s get this straight, NO ONE is an inspiration to us all, because we all have to be motivated and work hard for ourselves by supporting and guiding each other.

Everyone has their own struggles in life, and that’s okay. Why? Because it’s part of our humanity to struggle to get to the peak where we will eventually ‘cross over and rise above’. However, we all have to get through our struggles until we have done our duties or missions completed.

If you try to find inspiration to inspire you to do something or be a someone, then you won’t be doing anything except looking around your whole life finding nothing. So, please do something with your life and stop looking for inspiration from others especially the disability community. Why? Because we are human too. We have our own struggles too, to get where we want to be at, and by any one trying to find inspiration from the outside world like from the disability community to make us look bad and everyone else look good is the real tragedy.  That’s why inspiration is travesty and the word should not exist since it causes pain.

Struggling is a part of life. We need to have fun with our life. That’s right, we all need to have fun. Everyone’s fun is different. Some people try different things before they find it like with me. Some people like myself are Disabled activists and scholars, some people are media analysts, some are investment bankers, some are artists, some are writers/journalists, some are politicians to help the government to create/enforce laws, some are lawyers, some are social workers (or help with mental health maintenance), mail clerks and drivers, landscape workers, sanitation workers, janitors, some are medical doctors, some are engineers, some are teachers, some are construction workers, etc. We all do whatever it takes to become the success we want to see in our life with the support network in the community or life we build for ourselves.Without the support network and without the motivation in ourselves to do well, we become lost in our efforts. However, it does not always have to be that way.

We all have struggles all our life. We all can stay in the disability community our whole life or walk in and out of the disability community at different parts of our life. I just don’t want any one to ever think disability is a tragedy because it really isn’t. Acquiring d/Disability from birth or from life, is a part of life’s journey. We all can become disabled at some point or become more disabled, and that’s okay. It’s okay if we have to use a wheelchair or any other assistive device or machine to help us live our life if you need it or if we want to feel more mainstream or not. It’s our personal choice!

It’s okay if you are feeling very obstinate or unsure of how disability helps us with gaining empathy we all struggle with. Empathy is a learned human trait for everyone in the world. Some are born with more empathy than others, but no one lacks empathy since we all have emotions that frustrate us at times.  Sometimes we may not realize that our empathy can be misleading sometimes when we struggle with discriminations and stigmas in our life which is ableism. Ableism is a problem for the world. There are millions of people in the world struggling with ableism right now. Some people may not even be aware of it, but  it is inside of them already especially when the person has been objectified in their life at some point or their whole life. I feel for those people who are struggling more from their ableism because society doesn’t understand their language and dialect.

Ableism is about objectifying people while this needs to stop. It is also a struggle when everyone who has been hurt by ableism and internalizes this stigma, the stereotypes, and even can become the oppressor after being oppressed since ableism is also like a virus. Ableism is not only a curse, but it’s the biggest oppression that confuses people into thinking they are not worthy and unable to do something unless they become an inspiration to become objectified by others.

Objectification or ‘Inspiration Porn’ exemplifies and manifests a person’s persona to make them something they are not. There are so many people who objectify others that it becomes really pathetic in our society, but it does not always have to be that way. Change means allowing yourself to guide others into their own self-determination to live their life with just encouraging people to do what they love to do just the way you do for yourself. No one is a random act of good because we all are good people who can do whatever we want to do to help others.

We just have to think about our own mission to help, how we can guide and support others, and know how to advocate for change in our society to think about why we can’t hurt others in any way. Life is a journey with emotions that does not mean we can say or do things to others to hurt them since that is not only ableism, but is also other forms of pain too, inflicted on others. People can be hurtful which is also a part of life, however, we need to know that what we do and say affects other people either instantly or over time. Over time, we all internalize the pain unless we start healing the pain(s).

So, let’s start healing the pains we all may have to become the person we all are meant to be with the guidance from the support network we are born into and choose from the billions of people in the world to be a part of it too. This is how ableism can heal from the pains we have all felt at some point, some a lot more than others especially those people struggling to ‘pass’ for society’s norm or standard of how to speak, think, feel, see, or hear.

Everyone has their own thoughts and opinions which means we all have the freedom to speak our mind respectfully and respecting others. No one can curse at, hurt, silence, or tell others that what they believe for themselves to contribute is bad. It’s not black and white ever (like  organizations like Autism Speaks suggests about autism), it’s all gray, and it always has been gray. There is good and bad in everything from the yin and the yang as long as we know what is good and what is bad, we can focus on the positive aspects of our life. Thus, focusing on the positive aspects of other people. Finally, becoming a contributing member of society from our own individual self-determination which is different for everyone in the world.

Some need more guidance, some need more support, though we all need mentorship to get through our life as we all fulfill our goals we want to achieve. That’s not inspiration, that’s just doing what it takes to be a success in what all of us want individually. Part of what having support is, is motivating our family members and peers who come in contact with to move forward with what we want.

Struggling to achieve something can be difficult, but not impossible. Impossible does not exist. The very word means ‘I’m Possible’ and we can’t let anyone take that dignity away from us. We know who we are and what we want regardless of what are identities are by identifying how we want to for ourselves. As an Autistic person and a part of the broader disability community, I have understood that disabilities helps us live our life better by embracing our own humanity.

No one can tell us who, what, and how we are to live our life. We are gift in this world. If we unwrap the gift with taking in negativity from the outside world, we become negative. Otherwise if we unwrap ourselves with positive feelings on how to help the world, we become the most positive force the world has ever seen embracing and celebrating life in of itself.

I struggle, you struggle, we all struggle with something we need. Some of us struggle more than others, but that just means they need more guidance and support. Since we all live our life with struggles, it just means, that once we need to figure out how to use our skills, our talents, and our strengths to do what we feel will help the world is when we can we feel our own humanity. Sometimes this is very small, sometimes very big, and/or sometimes it can just be teaching ourselves to become  a contributing member of society who positively affects everyone. We all are here to motivate each other to do well, not be jealous of any one.

We live our life positively, but most importantly, we live our life to do whatever we can to reach out and touch our spirit. If you can’t find yourself, if you don’t know what it is that you need to do, and you want other people to feel inspired by you saying your life is better than theirs (or vice versa), than you are wasting your life.

Please don’t waste your life trying to find this thing called inspiration especially from my fellow Autistic peers and any one else from the disability community. By calling us inspirations, you are also saying that your life has always been better than ours. The medical model suggests that the only way we become inspirations is by overcoming a burden or tragedy within ourselves to become an inspiration for others. However, this is a travesty and a false belief system that we don’t need to hear or see.

Inspiration is taking what others say as face value without thinking of yours or their own life because of the way the mainstream media and the masses objectify so many people including people in the disability community. The use of the phrase ‘Inspiration porn’ is to say that objectifying anyone the media wants to ‘use’, ‘stigmatize’, painfully stereotype, and dispose of later after the mainstream media has had enough of the person is hurtful. The media as a whole needs to change their way of thinking, how they think about humanity, and stop personalizing one’s own life of struggle as a tragedy that a person’s overcame to become a human being. We all our human beings from birth. Humanity means struggling to live our whole life through emotions we all have while finding our authentic voice and self to fulfill our greatest mission to do what we love to do. That’s what I’ve always known and was taught.

Do you want to try to find inspiration or do you want to do what it takes to live your life they way you always wanted it to help others? Humanity is about helping ourselves while helping others.

We need our own tenacity to work hard toward living our life, building our experience in life the way we want  to without anyone else trying to live it for us or will live it for us or even mimic other people’s lives.  I’ll tell you this that by trying to imitate other people’s lives, people won’t be their true authentic self. That’s why if we become obsessed with inspiration, we no longer know how to live our life. Please don’t do that! I want all of you to live your life and work hard for who you all are in this world.

There are billions of people in the world. From the billions of people in the world, that’s one big support network to help each other work independently for our own self-determination which means striving for whatever positive contributing factors we want to live our life.  We can all be supportive while guiding ourselves in our life through thick and thin. If someone is struggling, they need to think about getting back on track while if someone is struggling a lot they need you to lead them more with guidance.

Getting back on track is not inspiration, it’s just life. We all fall back into situations where we need to get back on our feet, however, that does not mean we look for someone else for inspiration, it just means we have to push ourselves to live do whatever it takes to get back on our feet with whoever is supporting and guiding us. Remember, there is always someone who can guide you, any one just has to ask, as a self-advocate.

Life is not about inspiration, it’s about self-advocacy and helping others achieve that self-advocacy!

Thank you all!

Be that change,

and heal the world!

OUT, J

A Reflection I wrote in the Fall on ‘The Importance of Inclusive Education’ and a few other things about Autism Acceptance

The article, “Islands of Loneliness:,” by Theoharis, et. al, the authors write about the importance of inclusive education for Autistic people like myself. I reflect how I agree with the authors. They interview several Self-Advocates on the autistic spectrum including Temple, Tito, Daniel Tammet, and others (there is also Carly Fleischmann as well). These people have different stories about what drives them for social interaction because if you met one Autistic person you’ve only met one Autistic person. Every one on the autistic spectrum is different. And as in beginning of the song by Freddie Jackson called “You are my Lady,” he sings “There’s something that I want to say, but words sometimes get in the way…” This song makes me think of how it is hard for Autistics many times to communicate the way so called ‘normal’ people speak.

Instead of reiterating what my Autistic peers have told you in this article which are valid too, I prefer to reflect on my own needs and wants for social interaction. As I discussed in my reflection on Mark Haddon’s book, I went to Autreat 2 years in a row. I am hoping to make it to another Autistic run event again futures to come. Although it is not called Autreat anymore and Jim Sinclair does not run the week long event anymore. One of the many retreats over the summer was created after Jim disbanded Autreat, called Association for Autistic Community conference or what some people call Autistic Con or as some friends will still try to call ‘Autreat’.

I say being Autistic is culture because there are many things that make up who we are. For example, stimming like flapping when we are happy, angry, sad, applauding, etc to express ourselves. Another part of Autistic culture is echolalia which means a person like myself repeats words or phrases without realizing it. It is very hard to be around Non-Autistic people especially those people without disabilities because they typically do not understand us. Sometimes I don’t get enough energy (or in Autistic culture we call enough spoons) to explain to Non-Autistic people what we are and how we like to interact. Though many people find because I have practiced passing as normal so many times, that there are Non-Disabled people who don’t really think of me being Autistic. However, I am and always will be!

Autistic people do socialize when we want to, we just need to be comfortable with the person we are about to socialize with. If someone is going to want to interact with us, then we need them to understand our own space so no one crosses into our boundaries either verbally or nonverbally. Everyone always talks about how Autistic people lack social skills, but there are many Non-Autistic people who lack social skills too. Social skills and boundaries should be taught in schools with everyone. The article talks about the importance of inclusive education among every student even those who are on the autistic spectrum and I truly believe that inclusive education helps. However, it’s not perfect since inclusive education needs to still ensure every one in the classroom including teachers respect one another.

I wanted to make sure I was mainstreamed by the time I reached Junior High School. Although since the education system wasn’t exactly accepting back when I was in secondary school, I was bullied not only by students, but by some teachers too. Society decided to create segregative schools and settings for Autistic people since we were different. They felt and still feel by segregating many of us, and teaching us to conform, we would learn to adapt to the current system. We were considered burdens to the current school system and to society, so they place many of my Autistic peers in segregative Residential school centers throughout the world today (like the Judge Rotenberg Center). This is not inclusive and does not provide us with the self-determined social interaction that many other Human cultures are given in school.

Educating people does not even mean placing students in private charter schools either where the students go home after a single school day. The current public primary and secondary school systems need to acknowledge the many ways a person interacts and communicates and learns with the world. Not being able to speak does not mean we don’t want interaction or communication, it just means we may use different ways to communicate our thoughts to others. For example, Henry Frost fought to be included in the public school system as a Non-verbal Autistic youth!

Loneliness is a problem in this world that society created, but we can solve it by understanding each other more. By understanding each other, we can read the many hundreds of blogs written by my Autistic peers telling our stories as more blogs are created too. The article stresses how many people on the autistic spectrum write about their autobiographical stories for others to read. Well, everyone needs to read them all whether published in books or personal blogs, and read each account as a way of understanding the differences so that society can understand and accept. Listen, read, learn, and understand Autistics who have their own way of just being and interacting.

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Additions after the reflection I wrote:

There are many Autistic people who are Non-Verbal. It can be hard for parents of Autistic children to know that not every child is going to be the same wanting and reaching for the same goals as what many parents want for their children. Many parents want their children especially those who are Autistic, to think like the status quo and make a lot of money, and I understand why. Not everyone can be a CEO, a Director, a social butterfly, or even a Celebrity, and parents need to understand this. It’s okay for any one to be their own unique success story. Many parents of Autistic children want their children to be success stories not needing any support. Support is a necessary part of being Human because everyone needs some kind of connection all throughout their lives to feel a part of someone else. That’s why we have our families, so people can be supported. Independence is important, but everyone needs to remember the importance of Interdependence in humanity.

Please Read Lydia Brown’s “Privilege and the Myth of Independence” on her blog, Autistic Hoya!

Please also read Alyssa’s post on “Ableism is to Blame”

Please also read Kassiane’s post here ‘On Role Models’ from her blog from 2012.

There is also another retreat called Ocate Cliffs as well, run by Star Ford who runs Divergent Labs!

Here is a video I like to show people about what not to say to Autistic people.

Here is a video by Drew Morton Goldsmith a Non-verbal Autistic person who talks about the importance of Autistic Rights!

and, here is a video series called Ask an Autistic, Amythyst has a series of videos on ‘Ask an Autistic’ who vlogs different topics each week on her You Tube account, she also has a blog which she states on the videos. This is the first episode:

Any one who wants to see Citizen Autistic on Hulu can see it tomorrow and talk about it on a Twitter feed on Monday!

There is so many things every one needs to learn about that people generally don’t know or think about when people think about autism in general.

Causton-Theoharis, J., Ashby, C., & Cosier, M. (2009). Islands of loneliness: Exploring social interaction through the autobiographies of individuals with autism. Journal Information, 47(2).

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Have a great week!!

OUT, J