A Poem Called “To Please Yourself is to not think of anyone else”

To Please Yourself is to not think of anyone else,

by theamazinJ

It’s my life,
and no one else’s,
it’s my life,
even when people disagree,
it’s my life,
even if anyone disagrees with me
my whole life too,
it’s my life,
I choose things in my life
for a reason,
as an activist,
as a person who is
committed to human rights,
disability justice,
self-determination,
and with the rights
everyone has of supported decision making.
As a person who
does not like
the way the world is today
from the many discriminations
and injustices that are serving
everyone living today.
From the ideas of
the way society uses
the medical model
to hurt so many people,
and the way
everyone hurts,
not everyone understanding each other,
that because of this
there is disability culture
separate from non-disability culture
and because of this
I saddened to know
that from the two different cultures
not understanding each other,
universal design is not realistic,
and too ideal,
because there are
too many non-disabled people
who think of only themselves
and there are
too many disabled people
that are angry about this,
that can this war over words
really end?
can this war over words really end?
The war over words,
eventually leads to violence,
eventually leads to a tougher life,
and eventually leads to
everyone learning the hard way.
Our lives are good,
as human beings
we have the ability to love,
we have the ability to understand each other,
we have what it takes to serve justice for all,
but many do not want justice,
many are too complacent,
too complicit,
and many just want to live in LaLaLand,
while many just want to think about the medical model
without considering life
and what living life really is like,
even when someone gets a diagnosis,
even when someone seeks surgeries
for that diagnosis,
or even alternative treatments.
Some of these treatments
are imperative and can be fatal if not treated,
while other treatments
are a choice from the person, the individual,
to live their life treated to
live under the current social construction
as who they are without seeking to pass,
or live their life different than who they are
choosing to seek treatment to
pass and please people in society.
Everyone has their choices to make,
the ultimate choice is,
please yourself or please others,
and whatever you please,
there are consequences and rewards,
you just have weigh in on
the choice that best fits your life,
but remember this,
even when you are anxious over this decision,
asking too many people what to do,
and not relaxing and letting things happen,
you still must please yourself regardless.

Building Bridges when meeting people in groups

Meet up groups : Specific Functions

1) Meeting with likeminded individuals in the community, not in a congregate settings like a home or other segregated areas
2) Hanging out, socializing, getting to know people in the community going to events the organizers create
3) Sharing ideas
4) Not anticipating finding a sexual partner, (if the person is looking for this then they should not anticipate or expect this at all from happening), and just sharing each other’s moments even if it is playing a board game or any other type of activity
5) Think about building bridges with each other and not complaining or criticizing each other

Meeting in groups are supposed to be for fun social events for everyone to enjoy together because people came together for that purpose. Don’t let anyone take that fun away from you and don’t allow anyone into your head to take your experience you needed from that group. Some groups exist and are run by professionals like social workers, but not all are run by professionals. Every group is run for a purpose to bring people together. Those people who are impaired needing support to get them to the group tend to go to groups that are run by professionals while those people who are impaired with needing little support in getting them to the group, tend to go to groups run by peers.

No one can go to a group to anticipate meeting anyone even finding a partner or a friend. It is just about being with a group in the community. When anyone is in a congregate setting too long whether it is in their own home or other segregative setting, it is not good for anyone.

When getting people together, it is never about anticipation, it is all about not hesitating to be meeting people in the group you choose to be with. Meeting in groups is all about being with others who want to experience and explore together the same event or socializing experience at the exact time and at that exact moment of human experience. It does not matter whether the person is disabled or not, inclusion should be an option if the person desires to be in that group respectively as part of the community.

That is why I created my own group on the meet up website over a year ago called Neurodiverse Central Network. This is group is about hanging out with people regardless of disability and varying impairments with their allies if desired as well if they want to have them there. Members of this group respect each other regardless of disability or not, and by respecting each other, no one can make any one feel bad for what they feel or believe. The conversation is open to experiencing each other and communicating different ideas, respecting opinions as just that, opinions. That’s what nothing about us, without us, is all about.

A Poem Called “Nothing About Us”

Nothing About Us,

by theamazinJ

Everywhere we go,
everywhere we look,
We see destruction,
we see walls being built,
we see the development of institutions,
we see the lack of community building,
everywhere we go we see Donald Trump’s face
in place of the faces from the 1930’s,
where in 1927, Oliver Wendell Holmes
from the U.S. Supreme Court
finished what was started in America
where the dark history of America
helped stir the pot in Germany back then,
where even today
many people still keep in mind
what American History is really about,
keeping the rich richer,
and about building a fascist state of mind,
while The U.S. Supreme Court in 1927
from Buck Vs. Bell
secured a statement
that is still in everyone’s minds today
stirring the message over and over in their heads.
The message was clear, the message was disturbing,
and the message was concrete,
when Holmes said “Three Generations of Imbeciles were enough…”
It allowed the preconceived notion
that the medical model of disability will dominate,
it also allowed Americans
to build a war against each others
against society
and against disability
while at the same time
trying to prevent disability
and not only that,
but eventually labeling
everyone ‘high’ functioning or ‘low’ functioning,
and even establishing medical charity organizations
to this day
to use this rhetoric from Buck vs. Bell
even more than they had done before
to establish a society of sameness,
a society of perfect bodies,
a society where there would be lethal forced euthanasia,
a society where there would be eradication of certain peoples,
and a society segregating people
by class, by gender, by race, by sexuality, by ability,
and by religion.
This is the society Donald Trump wants,
this is the society that Paul Ryan hopes for,
this the society Mitch McConnell strives for
and what Mike Pence asserts every day.
We need to stop this from happening,
we need to embrace every part of humanity
every day of our lives,
with supporting each other,
and encouraging everyone
while remembering
why we are here on this planet,
and how we can rely on each other everyday for support.
Society is interdependent,
we are not finches,
we cannot take Darwin literally when he said
it’s ‘Survival of the Fittest’,
because humanity is different,
humanity is supported,
we support one another,
we support other animals,
we support other kingdoms of taxonomy,
we support the climate of this great planet,
if someone is sought out to destroy this diversity
then we need to sought out justice to the people
wanting to harm and wanting to do this,
because we need to construct
a world of love for this planet
and everything and everybody that is on it,
no one can take that away
and no one can segregate or harm another,
in the end,
its our duty to take care of one another
regardless of who or what we are,
regardless of what kinds of supports
the person needs to achieve their own self-determination,
because we cannot be influenced by
Donald Trump’s establishment or Paul Ryan’s anger or Mitch McConnell’s fury,
or even Mike Pence’s ignorance,
To be truly United,
we need to include everyone,
we need to build community,
because disability is part of the human experience,
but is also part of living organisms,
and we need to remember,
Nothing about us, without us
is Nothing about US.
Everyone supporting one another, is not controlling anyone regardless,
that’s what democracy is really about.

A Poem Called “Open at the Close”

Open at the Close,

by theamazinJ

My knowledge is useful,
my life is pure,
my feelings are genuine,
my misery is normal,
my normal is my companion,
whether I am feeling happy or not.
My trope is believable,
I am a Human being,
I am validated
because of thou
up in the heavens
looking down at us
and can live my life from all that.
I am golden,
I am not inspiration,
I lead by my own life,
by the way I am,
even after surgeries,
even after medicines,
even after accommodations,
I see too much
as sight worthy
and can see everything
from what any one is doing.
I feel difficult, different
in a marginalized life,
though, I am unforeseen,
I am open to all that is open,
I close at the open,
I open at the close,
I am a spectre
moving up and down
through the door,
seeing Gold, Gold, Gold,
remarkably open,
closed on me,
closed on you,
life is like that,
from an incredibly beautiful way to live,
regardless of what you think,
or, who you are,
life is beautiful
to all that we can say
to all that we do,
and to all that we are
because,
this life is all about
the way we see it,
the way we want to live it,
and remembering
we are open at the close
and close at the open
no matter what
and for whatever it is worth.

A Poem Called “Feelings”

Feelings,

by theamazinJ

Are we mad?
Are we crying?
Are we angry?
Madness is real,
Happiness is seriously experienced.
It’s Ok to be crying,
It’s Ok to be angry,
It’s Ok to laugh and enjoy,
Feelings are real,
but how much is too much,
how much feelings can we really express,
feelings hurt, feelings show hurt,
feelings can be happy,
feelings can be funny,
feelings can go too far
feelings can not express that much,
feelings are emotional,
everywhere we go,
everywhere we see things,
we express our emotions through feelings,
Raging feelings from everywhere,
raging these things sometimes extremely,
sometimes not so much,
but, is it Ok to express our feelings as hurt?
Sometimes we scream to be heard,
other times we whisper to conceal,
and many times its hard to speak up clearly
what we want to express from our feelings.
Everywhere we go,
everywhere we think things through,
every time we search for what we feel,
we don’t exactly feel.
The search is over,
feelings are there through emotions,
it’s Ok to express how we feel,
no matter how we feel.
It takes guts,
it takes experience to use them,
and it even allows our feelings to ponder.
Pondering joy,
withering sadness,
perseverating over anger,
being afraid,
it’s all a part of being human.
It’s okay to stay strong,
but being strong is using these feelings
using these as entitlements,
using these as part of privileges,
using these parts of ourselves
like a lion roaring in the country,
because
we experience everything really
we experience almost anything,
and we experience growth when we age,
for as we age,
we experience feelings like an eclipse,
an eclipse that is unpredictable in how we feel about things,
an eclipse that contributes to graphic display,
when it’s so important to feel,
even when we want to explore,
and even when we give love in the dark
to bring in the light,
while we feel,
while we enjoy the bright lights,
finally experiencing the world.
Everywhere we go,
everywhere we stay,
everywhere we live,
we need to curb our feelings
we need to let go and pick our battles,
because in the end,
there are consequences
more so than rewards,
and from those consequences is taking responsibility
remembering to use those feelings kindly
while without warning and without unpredictability,
to give those around you
the feelings you want them to have
to feel good.